Sick Day
by Evilkeen
Summary: Gendo Ikari--the most powerful and feared man in the world...calls in sick. Then the real crisis begins...
1. The Fun Begins

## Sick Day

  


#### By [Evilkeen][1]

Nobody knew where Gendo Ikari's apartment was.

Not that anyone had ever needed to know where the commander of NERV lived, no one knew him at all outside of work. But then no one knew him inside of work. Except perhaps two people.

"Dr. Akagi?"

"Yes Maya?" she answered from her executive chair. Ritsuko wore the usual get-up, a zipper top, and black mini-skirt with a white lab coat draped almost absently over her tall frame. In any other place it would have (minus the coat) been a hot get up. Here she was Ice Queen.

"SEELE wants us to give this encoded message to Commander Ikari himself, and he's... well Commander Ikari's taken... the day off."

Simultaneously everybody in the room shot bolt upright in their seats _"WHAT?"_ Thought everyone in the room. One person sprayed his tea all over the console station and was furiously trying to wipe it up with a NERV uniform shirtsleeve before the liquid damaged something.

Everyone had their own image of Gendo Ikari they ranged from 'distant' to 'Blood Junkie' he was not a man to take a day off. He was dedicated, he was driven...

He was crazy.

Ritsuko was somewhat less surprised then the rest of the staff and recovered first, "Very well," she said, "he left a number for us to call in case of emergencies."

She punched up the number into her deskphone, and put the receiver up to her ear. It didn't even ring once when a recording of Gendo's voice, slightly muffled, came on.

"Moshi-MoshiAAAAAAAACHOOOOO sniffle Dis is Commander Ikari speaking, I'm sick and hab turd off the phone to ged some rest AAAAACHOO. Blease leave a message after the beeb [the voice dropped in volume] I'm gonna barf."

The machine dutifully recorded almost thirty seconds of Ritsuko breathing in shock and surprise, before she clicked down the receiver and stared into space.

The command room staff stared back at her.

"Err, Sub-Commander Fuyutski should know where his apartment is," she finally said.

Maya cleared her throat, "Um, he's at the second impact site at the moment and can't be reached."

Great.

Ritsuko shook her head angrily. Dammit, she was a scientist, she had to think up something.

"Analyse the background noise of the recording through the MAGI," she said, "let the computer pinpoint his location."

The recording was inputted, and three seconds later, a message Flashed up on Dr. Akagi's screen.

FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF DAUGHTER DEAREST It read.

Ritsuko hurriedly cleared the screen, "Erm, uh, the MAGI are too busy to calculate this," she lied to Maya.

Someplace else, Gendo hurled up his ramen breakfast into a large bowl sitting beside his bed. He groped on his bedside table around his 'sick kit' for the plastic wrap. He found it and ripped off a portion, he covered the top of the bowl to keep the stench in.

In a sudden dizzy spell he lay back on the bed, and he would have kept that same comfortable position except for one tiny problem...

"God I have to pee," he said to himself.

He tried to get up, couldn't, and started to frown to himself. "Enough," he told himself, "I am a powerful man, I run NERV, the most important and influential organization in the world, I will not be defeated by a mere virus." And on sheer willpower he propelled himself out of bed and started towards the bathroom.

He made it about three steps.

It was a good thing that he managed to rip the plastic wrap off the bowl in time.

"...Ayanami, Rei," called out the Sensei at morning roll call.

No answer.

"Ayanami, _Rei_", he repeated.

Still nothing.

"Rei Ayanami," he called out, exhausting all different word-order possibilities.

Finally the teacher in irritation ripped his gaze from the window and looked at her desk. She wasn't there as usual.

"She's absent again," said a boy helpfully at the back of the class.

The teacher sniffed, "Thank you Mr. Aida for pointing that out." He gazed over the room, " Who will give her this week's notes after school?" He picked out the most visible person in the class, "Miss Langley."

"Oh great," she moaned, "I've got to clean up Wonderchild's mess again."

The Sensei ignored her, he ignored everybody. "Now it's time for a lecture on the Second Impact..."

The entire class moaned.

Gendo Ikari had finally solved his bathroom problem. But now he needed to empty his 'sick bowl' it was close to overflowing.

He felt like screaming, he hurt in places he never knew he had before, his face hurt, his eyes hurt, his belly button ached, his teeth itched, and his hair was all cramped up. He needed some way to distract himself, something to make him feel happy.

He knew what.

Grabbing the remote control from the bedside table, he turned on the TV and activated the VCR which he always had one tape in all the time and never changed. Onscreen the home videos of him and his wife Yui Ikari played for him. At the picnic by the lake, on the vacation. Pictures of him and his young wife were shown, they were smiling, laughing, joking with each other; being content.

And Gendo felt happy. Yui was Happiness.

Suddenly the Picture went out.

Static, then:

Fuyutski's voice: Hey! Is this thing on?

The picture shakes

Fuyutski's voice: Guess not.

More picture shaking. Then the viewpoint clatters to a rest staring sideways at a doorframe. A fuzzy picture of a butt obscures the picture for a second.

Fuyutski's voice: Dammit, where's that little prick Gendo?

The butt shrinks down to become a man's back, which exits the door and moves down the hallway out of sight.

The picture remained fixed on the doorway.

Gendo whimpered into his pillow.

It was 3:10 and Shinji was going home, or rather that was his intention. He was being gripped on both shoulders from behind.

"Shinji, you're coming with me," ordered a very familiar voice.

"Asuka," he complained, "why do you need me to help you give Rei her notes."

From behind she got real close up, and hugged him. No it wasn't a hug; people who gave you hugs didn't cut off your air supply. Her lips were right by his earlobe, she whispered into his ear, her breath tickling his neck, "Because Baka," she hissed, "I don't know where Wonderchild's place is."

Shinji was feeling both frightened and pleasant, it was always a good policy to be afraid of Soryu Asuka Langley, but he liked the feeling of someone--especially her--holding him. He had never been hugged by anyone since mother.

His pleasant feeling finally won over his fright, and he spent the next ten seconds enjoying the feeling until he passed out from oxygen depravation.

By the time they reached the apartment complex where Rei's apartment was, Shinji was still a bit dizzy, and he had a red mark around his neck, which looked like an angry red sunburn. When he had first woken up, Asuka was sitting in a chair at the nursing room at school looking almost as if she was concerned.

"Are you OK?" she had asked him. When he had said yes, she exhaled noisily, tried to mask her relief, and then proceeded to drag him brutally from the bed.

He rang the bell. No answer, Asuka gave him a look of disdain--as if he were somehow ringing it wrong--and then gave the button a push as well.

No answer.

Shinji--hoping that his walking in unannounced in the past hadn't prompted Rei to install a security system, or worse, invest in a handgun--opened the door.

Asuka was inside, and following Shinji's lead, took off her footwear. "This place is creepy," she thought, "it fits right in with everything else about Wonderchild." She tried to tell herself that she was only sticking close to Shinji because it was a cramped hallway.

Finally they got to Rei's room, it was just as dirty as it had been before Shinji had cleaned it up with Suzahara, not that Suzahara actually helped.

"Fooooohhyyy," exclaimed Asuka in disgust, "what a pig Ayanami is, and that smell..." She rambled on a few minutes while thinking in her head. "She's not even here! I wonder why she gets to always skip while I'd get in trouble, I'm gonna get her brought down."

"Well?" asked Shinji.

"Well what?" she said annoyed.

"Are we going to drop off the notes and GO now?" he said exasperated (well as exasperated as he could get.)

"No, Baka, we're not."

"What?"

"Because I'm so considerate, we're going to deliver the notes in person, wherever she may be."

"What's all this we stuff?" he accused, "You've already been shown where Ayanami's apartment is, so you certainly don't need me."

"Dammit, he's becoming more and more difficult to manage all the time." She thought annoyed. "Because, Baka!" she spit at him, "Misato gave me a note before she left to God knows where, and this note said we were to stick together." She whirled and stalked out of the apartment, reappearing about ten seconds later to put on her shoes.

"If I can find out where Wonderchild is playing hooky, I can report to the principle and get her in the trouble she deserves," she didn't know why, two people going the opposite direction down the sidewalk past her stumbled and nearly fell.

But then, she couldn't see the maniac grin she has plastered on her face.

* * *

"Sister Katsuragi?"

Misato looked up towards the voice, Sister Lisa was staring in concern at her. Misato grinned inwardly, It worked, they actually think I'm a nun. "Yes?"

"Your bags have arrived from...Uh-."

"Seppuku Monastery," Misato supplied. I am SO glad that no one here knows Japanese.

"..right," finished Sister Lisa.

Misato bowed, thanked her, and made the sign of the cross on her chest just to be sure, and went to her quarters. This was a great idea, just the sort of thing to get rid of stress and drain the refuse from my body. She opened the door to her Spartan sleeping quarters and sat down on the small bed. Taking off the robe she had managed to procure in such short notice, she then slipped on the Habit left for her in the drawer. Great, all set Misato frowned except that I've never read the Bible...

_End of Chapter One._

   [1]: mailto:evilkeen@hotmail.com



	2. Rei of the Gun

## Sick Day

Chapter Two   


#### By [Evilkeen][1]

If nothing else, Rei Ayanami was a master at three things: Piloting an Eva, Understanding Commander Ikari, and Guns. And a Gun was exactly what she held in her hand at that moment--or at least, a reasonable facsimile thereof--while she stared at the screen in front of her. 

She tightened her grip on the plastic handle in anticipation, it was painted a pastel shade of blue as to prevent accidents, and it had 'Namco' imprinted on the side, but the weight was right and the force feedback accurate, and that was all she needed. 

The screen lit up with targets. 

She squeezed the trigger rapidly, the force feedback making a 'ka-clack' sound against her palm. 

*ka-clack* 

Middle of the forehead. 

*ka-clack ka-clack* 

Cleanly in both eye sockets. 

*ka-clack ka-clack ka-clack* 

Throat, Chest, and Crotch respectively. 

'PERFECT SHOT' the computer proclaimed as computer generated people fell to the floor dead onscreen, 'PLEASE ENTER NEW HIGH SCORE.' and printed off a list that went something like this: 

  1. ___? 
  2. REI 
  3. REI 
  4. REI 
  5. REI 
  6. REI 
  7. REI 
  8. REI 
  9. REI 
  10. REI 

Rei's scarlet eye's narrowed, this machine was supposedly the most difficult one in the arcade, and she'd only started playing since this morning. 

A friendly-yet-somewhat-nervous Employee walked up to her and stopped, "Errm," he mumbled, "uhh, shouldn't you be in school?" 

She looked hard at him for an uncomfortable period of time. "No," she finally stated. 

"Ahhh," he replied in an intellegent tone, "well then, good day." And with that, he spun around and stalked off with a quickened pace. 

Rei smiled a little smile, and aimed at the back of his retreating head with the arcade light-gun. 

*ka-clack* 

---------- 

Nerv Central required a constant 24 hour crew, and since there was usually nothing happening, which meant that the biggest drain on MAGI was simultaniously running about 2,530 unique and independant games of computer solitaire. Ritsuko used to play Solitaire as well on down-time, until she got annoyed at the computer continually giving her some 'motherly advice' about playing style every few minutes into a game. Instead she usually zoned out listening to music on headphones. 

Shigeru Aoba, on the other hand, was watching a video moniter with great interest, it was a security moniter image of a pimply faced teenager in a uniform and desparately clutching a pizza box with both hands, warding off a swarm of security drones. "Please oh please let me deliver this pizza in peace!" wailed a tinny voice from a speaker on his desk. 

Makoto Hyuga glanced over from a game of Solitaire that he was loosing badly, and murmured. "You've already been banned from ordering from 3 other pizza joints already, lay off man." 

Aoba grinned, "oh come on, it builds character and'll give him something to tell his grandkids when he's old." 

Hyuga's eyes rolled, "I can see it now, 'I once delivered pizza to a buildingful of maniacs with too much money and military technology at their disposal' Sounds like a heartwarming tale." 

Meanwhile, Maya Ibuki had been eyeing the unusually vacant command desk with a feeling of insatiable curiosity. _"Oh, one little peek couldn't hurt,"_ she thought and scampered up silently to the big desk near the top of the room. She cautiously opened up a desk drawer. It was completely empty, except for a pair of clean white gloves. 

_"Odd,"_ she thought to herself, "I would have thought he wore those gloves all the time." Unbidden a mental image of Gendo Ikari taking a shower wearing nothing but those white gloves flashed into her mind. She supressed a giggle. Then, acting on irrational urge, she slipped the white gloves on her hands, curiously, they were an exact fit. 

Suddenly, Maya Ibuki began to feel distinctly odd, she sat down in the commanders chair, and enjoined her hands together in front of her mouth, but something was missing. Frowning, she pulled a pair of old reading glasses from her pocket and put them on. She surveyed the crew below. 

_"Peons"_ she snorted with contempt. _"Yet all is going to plan,"_ Maya smiled an evil little smile... 

--------------- 

It was rather odd, thought Shinji Ikari, that Asuka had it in her head that Rei would be found frequenting her own favourite spots to hang out. He was also quite irritated (and perhaps a little scintillated) that the itinerary included a few too many lingerie shops that Asuka had dragged him into insisting that 'Two people could search a store faster then one.' It was however--he concluded--much better then the time he was living with Misato alone, and she forced him to go out to buy her several 'feminine' products. 

He shuddered. 

--------------- 

Gendo's fever had steadily gotten worse as the day progressed, and he knew it was getting to a bad point when a hallucinatory (he hoped) four-foot blue bipedal creature with a monacle appeared in front of him. 

"Dear lord," said the monacled thing, "you look like crap. What the devil happened to you?" 

"Sick," mumbled Gendo. 

The thing _'tisked'_ at him "It's the Dreadful weather in this place," he sniffed, "just be glad you aren't dead of tuberculosis by now." 

Gendo nodded in agreement. "So where from?" he mumbled, just to be polite. 

"Hokkaido," replied the creature, pointing in a northerly direction just to be helpful. 

"Guess it's been a while since I've been there." Gendo thought aloud feverishly. 

"Well it _HAS_ changed a lot in the last few..." the creature trailed off and affixed the prone commander with a sympathetic look. "Oh dear, your fever is getting bad, you should hang on for the ride." 

"Thank you," said Commander Ikari dutifully. 

Then his world exploded in rainbows. 

_End of Chapter Two_

   [1]: mailto:evilkeen@hotmail.com



	3. How Asuka got her Groove back

## 

Sick Day 

##### 

Chapter Three: How Asuka Got her Groove back   
OR   
How Asuka learned Olympic-class Sprinting out of Necessity 

It took some time, but Gendo finally worked through his deliriums, first there was the exploding rainbow phase, then he was chasing a pesky cold spot around his bed, and finally he was working out the logistics of clothing, feeding, and commanding an army of Skeletons. 

Gendo only finally regained full mental consciousness sometime later, he was lying on the floor of the bathroom, naked except for a towel wrapped around his head, and a single black sock draped artfully over his crotch to preserve modesty. He found himself hugging tightly a very new and expensive looking teddy bear which he had never seen before in his life. This worried him ever so slightly. 

Dressing smartly in some black casual civvies, Gendo walked towards the phone to notify Nerv central that he was ready to return. When his hand stopped inches away from the receiver, he frowned. Rarely did he ever get a genuine day off. And this was the perfect opportunity to get away from it all. His hand retracted from the phone slowly. _"It's only going to be a dreary 24 hour shift yawn-fest,"_ he thought to himself, _"Besides, what could go wrong?"_

Maya Ibuki was Not Pleased. 

She had been Not Pleased for several hours, for despite the intoxicating powers that being the leader of a powerful organization held for her, when nothing happened to justify the use of said powers for six hours straight, it got a trifle boring. Maya sneered at the lax-seeming Nerv employees below. 

"Ants," she sneered, "they're all just a bunch of pointless scurrying ants." 

Aoba was keeping occupied in his seat down below when suddenly he felt an itchy-burning feeling on his left earlobe, as his hand went up to scratch it, he caught a small dot of light fall on the back of his fingers dancing like a jittery bug all over the back of his hand. He turned around and slowly traced the shaky light all the way back to it's source, which happened to be a giant magnifying glass lens being held in front of a powerful desk light by one Maya Ibuki who was staring at him intensely behind Commander Ikari's desk wearing a pair of ridiculously oversized reading glasses. She stared hard at Aoba and Aoba stared back, conscious of the small dot of light wavering over his shirt. Finally she broke off the glare and put the magnifying glass away, putting on an uncanny imitation of the 'Commander Ikari Pose' and staring off into space. 

Aoba kept staring for a while longer before turning around and fixating on his Nerv screensaver. _"Man, some things are best left unknown..."_

Maya Ibuki was starting to get really bored, really really bored and she knew that staying in command central wouldn't fix the situation. So she decided to tour Tokyo-3, checking for areas that were susceptible to angel attack, it was a job only for a commander of a secretive and powerful organization, which, of course, she was. She got up and started to walk towards the room's exit. 

Ritsuko caught Maya's egress in the corner of her eyes, she pulled off her headphones and the tinny sounds of Jazz could be heard emanating from the 'phones. 

"Maya!" she called out in a cheerful tone, "hey, where ya going?" 

Maya stopped and turned around and affixed the Doctor with a Look that was so cold one could be convinced that butter wouldn't even melt in that woman's mouth. "That is none of your concern Doctor" she said stiffly, and whirled about and exited. 

Ritsuko sat slowly back in her chair and blinked. "One day soon, me and that girl are gonna have words." she muttered. 

_Meanwhile 'Sister' Misato Katsuragi was in trouble; she'd found the communion wine._

Shinji was having an experience altogether new to him. He was actually having a civil conversation with Miss Asuka Langley. But it must be noted that this was only made possible by some numerous factors. Factors like exhaustion and hunger. And as they both sat on a park bench in the shade, eating take-out food that Shinji slowly nibbled on, they talked about movies and music and school. Shinji probably would've enjoyed staying that way forever, except--of course--something happened. Asuka made to get up to demonstrate a point, when her schoolbag caught on the bench, she flailed as she fell backwards and one of her hands landed right in Shinji's crotch. Asuka stumbled back in a panic, blushing. 

"S-s-s-sorry Shinji," she said fearfully. 

Shinji was slowly turning purple. "You-you-you...BAKA!" he yelled, and jumped up. 

Asuka--sensing her imminent death--jumped up and ran like hell. Shinji ran behind her swinging a mallet he'd produced from nowhere screaming "Asuka you PERVERT!!!" 

They ran fast as lightning, trees and buildings streaking by them unrecognizable. Ducking and weaving, the Wolverine in pursuit of the Rabbit, they ran as one, across streets, under bridges, and past an innocuous looking man in a baseball cap and t-shirt before they were gone. 

Gendo looked at the two indistinct blurs as they flew by, he adjusted his ballcap and squared his shoulders. 'Hmmmphing' as he continued walking. _"Damn Tokyo-3 ruffians"_ he thought to himself. 

Rei sat in the ice-cream parlour making notes to herself about the various patrons. When she finished with all that Eva business, she planned to become a writer, and a writer needed to study those around her to gain an accurate skill at characterization. She watched as a young boy got into an argument with his girlfriend. _"Hmm, now this kid is obviously in the right and to top it all off, he's presenting his side of the argument in a calm and rational manner. How completely unlike Shinji-God, what a spaz that boy can be sometimes. And Asuka, holy crap does that girl need medication."_ Rei continued her inner monologue, the arguing couple forgotten, all the people she knew at work were much more interesting anyway. 

Now one might be wondering at such radical idiosyncrasies in Rei Ayanami's behaviour from the well-established norm of cold, logical, passionless, albino. The truth is, it was all Gendo's fault; if Gendo hadn't handled the entire Ayanami-as-wife/daughter-resurrected situation with kid gloves, he might have actually given her something to _do_ during the days, given her a schedule, or enrolled her in an after-school program, like all regular mothers do to keep their offspring out of their hair. But instead, Rei always ended up in her own empty apartment, twiddling her thumbs, and slowly getting more and more mentally caustic. If Gendo had put her in some art classes, she would have remained emotionally arrested like all the other normal children. As it was, Rei was now--what some people would call--a wiseass, but only on the inside of her head, if she let her newly formed attitude out to the world, Gendo might actually make her _do_ something. Rei shuddered, the last thing she needed on her hands was that irresponsible oversexed braincell-killing purple haired woman assigned as her guardian. Best to let the world think she had the emotional range of a gnat. 

Just then a scared looking red streak followed by a furious looking brown and white streak zipped right by her window in the ice cream parlour. Rei blinked and stared. _"Good Gravy! Is that Shinji and Asuka in a bizarre reversal of roles?"_ she shook her head resignedly, _"All that tension between them is going to reach its breaking point one day and they'll either kill or shag each other."_

_Misato Katsuragi was in trouble, in her inebriated state, she was rapidly losing command of both her balance and the English language, she excused herself from morning devotions, saying she'd suddenly come down with Foot And Mouth Disease--which at the time seemed really clever._

_End of Chapter Three_


	4. Zone of the Benders

Sick Day 

Chapter Four: Zone of the Benders 

Misato was in bed; about two-thirds sober when a knock came at the door. 

"Come in," she said weakly, hoping that it was a kind nun with some soothing liquid. Instead, who entered the room was wholly unexpected. 

Misato blinked and rubbed her eyes, _"Holy Shit! I must be drunker then I thought!"_ she exclaimed. For in front of her appeared to be an orange and red insect, with a gigantic singular eye. The world tilted and reformed, and the giant insect turned into a man in an orange and red biocontainment suit. 

"Sister Katsuragi?" inquired the man in the suit, Misato nodded. "I've been ordered to detain you as standard anti-plague procedure, foot and mouth disease is a serious threat to the post-impact agriculture. Come along please." 

Misato's eyes widened,_ "If I'm caught, I'm boned for sure."_ And with a wild--if not slightly tipsy--yell, she jumped out of bed, jump kicked the suited man in the helmet, toppling him backwards, ran up the side of the wall and back-flipped out a closed window. Glass shards flowed in front of her vision as her perception of time slowed down to a crawl. Through the debris she spied the ground far away, but coming closer every instant. Misato frowned. 

_"Wait one second, Aren't I on the fifth floor?"_

She turned her head slowly and counted the number of windows below hers. 

_"Oh dear, I am."_

At just that moment, cruel fate stepped in to make her situation just a little bit worse, as the wind caught underneath her habit and smartly disrobed her, leaving her to fall in nothing but her lingerie. 

_"Goddammit!"_

And with nothing else but to fall downwards in her disrobed state and admire as glass particles tumbled endlessly in slow motion. Unbidden an old Beatles tune flashed through her head. 

_"How oddly inappropriate."_ she thought to herself. 

Then regular time returned and Misato rushed to meet the lawn. Luckily her fall was broken by falling through an awning, part of a birthday cake, and landing on a widely girthed Cardinal who was helpfully padded around the mid-section. 

Misato lay on the hapless Cardinal for a few moments, dazed. Her habit gently floated down and rested atop her prone form. She sat up, gripping the cloth. A moan came from beneath her. 

Misato addressed the distressed Man beneath her, "Be grateful, it's not everyday that a beautiful naked girl lands on you." 

Suddenly the convent doors burst open and five figures in bio-suits rushed out, the last holding an icepack gingerly to his forehead. The leader pointed at her, "There's the plague woman, get her!" 

Misato knew when she was unwanted, and jumped up, running away from the furious people who could only gape at this immodestly dressed young woman sprinting away, a Nun's habit trailing from her hands. 

_In Downtown Tokyo-3_

Gendo knew it was a mistake to go down this alley, he'd had a feeling about it ever since he passed the sign at the opening that read 'It's a mistake to go down this alley' Rat droppings helped plaster newspaper permanently to the concrete, and the disturbing scent of burnt ferret assaulted Commander Ikari's sensitive nostrils. Suddenly behind him someone chuckled. Gendo whirled around and beheld a large bolder. He blinked and the large bolder reformed itself into a disturbingly large individual. 

"You should have listened to the sign," the large individual spoke maliciously. He advanced on Gendo, drew a handgun, and fired it. 

Gendo's head snapped to the side, as the bullet with an accompanying distortion trail passed through the space where his head used to occupy. It was a very close call, but Gendo wasn't going to stop and congratulate himself. Instead, he jumped high--impossibly high--in the air, and scissorkicked his opponent in the face. The enormous thug dropped politely unconscious. Gendo landed softly, barely breathing hard. 

His cellphone rang. Gendo cursed and opened the phone; pressing the send button. "Hello." 

"Neo, for years you have been searching for an answer, an answer to the question that consumes you day and night."came a mysterious voice. 

"Who shot JR?" volunteered a confused Gendo. 

"No!" the voice said in a frustrated tone, "who is this?" it asked suspiciously. 

"Gendo Ikari." 

*Click-hummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm* 

Commander Ikari hung up. _"Crazy people should not have access to phones."_

*** 

Shinji and Asuka were wandering mainstreet, Shinji with a sheepish expression and Asuka with a rather nasty lump on her head, when the building cycle triggered. All around them highrises grew out of the ground and rose to astonishing heights. The ground rumbled and the air trembled. Shinji was impressed, he never got over the sense of awe that came from witnessing the city's transformation. Across the street a guy looked even more impressed. 

"Dude," the guy breathed in astonishment to his friend. "I don't know where you bought that stuff, but I think it's kicking in. I need to take another hit." 

The friend looked irritated and smacked the guy upside the head. 

Shinji had been taking in the scene with interest when he felt his own head being smacked from behind. He turned around, sure enough it was Asuka. In a way he was sort of relieved that she was being violent again, but not really. His eyes narrowed. "You know, a simple 'excuse me' would have sufficed." he hissed at her indignantly. 

Asuka's eyes widened fractionally, "Whoah, what's with you today, freaking out before and then giving me lip now? And by the way Shinji, I only let you chase me 'cause I needed the exercise." 

Normally Shinji would've meekly accepted her tirade and let the whole matter drop, normally. But this was not a normal day by any stretch of the imagination. He turned on her in disgust. "Ok, that I won't let stand. I beat you fair and square." 

Asuka rolled her eyes in the trademarked Langley fashion, "No you didn't, everyone knows that I'm superior to you mentally and physically. I can do anything." 

"I don't think you could. You gotta have some limits. I mean, isn't there anything you would be afraid or outraged to do?" 

"I'm not afraid to do anything!" 

"Oh yeah? Well how about...." 

*** 

_Hello and welcome to WTLK, Tokyo-3 talk hour. Today's topic is 'Carpool lanes--good or bad?' and here's our first caller." _

Woman's voice: Hello Jerry, long time listener, first time caller. Great to be on your show. 

Jerry: Aww shucks, it's great to hear a fan, so what's on your mind Miss...? 

Woman's Voice: [emphasized] it's COMMANDER_ Ibuki. And I'd just like to point out the extreme silliness of worrying about carpool lanes when I shall unleash destruction and chaos across you all. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH-click-.................. _

Jerry: *coughs* well it seems as if we'd had a technical error in our phone system, umm too bad. Next caller. 

*** 

_In Nerv Central_

Bridge Ensign Nomura frowned as he looked at his monitor. A pattern blue signal (signifying angels): was detected momentarily in a phone booth in west Tokyo-3. 

"Sir," he yelled to Maeda, "You better take a look at this..." 

  
_To Be Continued..._


End file.
